Vinnie's Tomb Chapter One

Vinnie's Tomb, Chapter One - The Road To Vinnie's Tomb (for lack of a better title) was a computer game released by Reldni Productions.

Development

Version 2.0

Reldni Productions is pleased to announce that Vinnie's Tomb Chapter One has finally been updated.

The game now has a pass code feature, so you don't have to start from the beginning of the game each time you play!

This version DOES NOT use or require the Microsoft Internet Explorer browser.

"Vinnie's Tomb, Chapter One - The Road To Vinnie's Tomb (for lack of a better title) Version 2.0" is now available. It is only 7.0 MB. It features amusing graphics and stunning sound. The game is free for downloading. It requires no registration. It is not available in stores. The game requires Windows '95. Vinnie's Tomb can be easily uninstalled after you realize it's a waste of disk space.

Transcript

The following is a complete and verbatim transcript of the game.

Welcome to Vinnie's Tomb

Are you ready for an incredible action game with stunning graphics and sound? How about spectacular 3D animation that puts "Duke Nukem 3D" and "Descnet" to shame? With Vinnie's Tomb, you'll experience first hand, the game you were not looking for. Vinnie's Tomb pales in comparison to "Duke Nukem" and many other favorite popular games! We hope however, you'll find a fun filled adventure that will amuse you for at least two minutes.

In the game, you take on the role of Vinnie the pierrot. You are on a journey to find the forbidden treasure of Ernie York. It is allegedly buried in your Great Great Great Great Not So Great Grandfather's electronic store. Long ago the store was converted into a tomb. Your Great Great Great Great Not So Great Grandfather was also named Vinnie. This is just one of the trivialities of the wonderfully splendid game we call "Vinnie's Tomb PART ONE (The Road to Vinnie's Tomb)". As you can see Reldni Productions lacks imagination when it comes to software titles. You'll probably have to read this introduction several times to make any sense of it.

A long time ago, or perhaps not, you learn that multimillionaire Ernie York kept a large sum of valuable electronic surveillance equipment and cryogenic hardware at an electronic store. This happened to be the same electronic store where your Great Great Great Great Not So Great Grandfather worked at. Fifty-nine years ago the store was transformed into a tomb. No one really remembers why.

Recently you received an anonymous phone call from an anonymous caller. The caller told you that your Great Great Great Great Not So Great Grandfather Vinnie was entombed by the local SZC (Sinister Zebra committee). Being a gullible idiot, you believed the caller.

Everyone in the world knows about the legend of Vinnie's tomb, except for the people who don't know about it. Now you must find the utter horrible truth! You'll meet bizarrely sketched creatures and pick up desirable objects during your quest to find Vinnie's Tomb. It's a lot of fun, we hope.

Scene One

Narrator: If you get distressed at any time, just remember: It's only a game!

Scene Two

(The bridge has collapsed! Fortunately, you have made it to the other side safely.)

Scene Three

Passcode: ALVIN

You have entered the underworld and completed Scene Three

Bonus Scene

Walk Slowly and Past The Hidden Death Traps

Scene Four

You enter the underworld...

You gently ride on a cushion of air to the underworld.  You do not have to wanter far until you reach two party-bots.  These stationary robots had been fused together to guard and protect.  They were programmed to throw pies at anyone entering the underworld during the war with the drunken eyed sailors of moldville.  The war has been over for years and Underworld has become a wealthy metropolis.  Inside the underworld city lies many lucrative franchises and taco stands.  You know that your journey most likely lies around the outskirts of the Underworld city.  Therefore, you will not have an opportunity to sample the fine dining establishments.

Hi this is Justin Crybaby again for Vinnie's Tomb, I'm gonna be the narrator. Hope you enjoy the game. I certainly don't. Uh, I mean, it's great, yeah!

Welcome to the Underworld! You can get keen bargains on assorted undergarments.

That sounds just fine. I'm trying to find the key to Vinnie's tomb. Can you help?

The key is rumored to have been hidden with the ancient Tibetan handkerchief.

Where should I start looking?

There's an old queer snake who lives in a pile of garbage. He may be able to help. He's not far from here.

Thank you. I'll try to find him.

Scene Five

(This is about as scary as it gets. Enjoy it.)

You now have the skull that oozes blood intermittently.

Scene Six

(This game has nothing to do with Maurice Chevalier.)

You must be the queer snake that the party-bots told me about.

Actually my brother is the queer one.

Where is he?

He went to Las Vegas for a gig. He's bigger than Wayne Newton.

Very interesting. I'm looking for a key to Vinnie's Tomb.

The key is with me. I'm keeping it for him. When he gets back from Vegas, he plans to find Vinnie's Tomb himself.

Would you consider selling or trading the key?

Sorry. It belongs to my brother. I cannot give it up without his permission.

Item collected! You now have the glittery diamond.

Item collected! You now have an overripe banana.

Scene Seven

You enter Fun Land and complete Scene Seven

Scene Eight

Passcode: LALAL

Why do you guys look so sad? I thought this place was Fun Land.

That is the cruel irony.

Why are you so sad?

We just found out that Donny Osmond canceled his gig here. That's only part of it though.

Tell me more.

There is a monster who terrorizes us through the night.

That's terrible! Does he try and eat you?

No. He tells horrible one liners and sings show tunes.

That doesn't seem too bad.

He sounds like Leonard Cohen and he sings at three o'clock in the morning.

That is bad.

(You would like to ask the sad guys about Vinnie's Tomb, but they appear too upset to answer any questions.)

(The alien space ship is suspended high in the sky above Fun Land.)

You now have a metal box.

Scene Nine

Hello. How are you this fine morning?

Who is that? I can't see anyone there.

I'm an invisible horse.

Why are you invisible?

The designer of this game can't draw horses.

The designer can't draw at all.

Would you like to see how I look?

Not really, but go ahead.

What do you think?

I think you should stay invisible.

I guess you're right.

Do you know anything about Vinnie's Tomb?

According to legend it's a tomb where a clown named Vinnie and his band of chickens were buried twelve centuries ago.

The legend is wrong. There were no chickens.

Well, the chickens added some colour to the story.

I need the key to Vinnie's Tomb, but the snake will not part with it.

That does not matter. I have a dozen keys to Vinnie's Tomb.

You do?

Sure. That fool snake and his queer lounge king brother think they have a monopoly on Vinnie's Tomb keys. They don't know that I have amassed a collection of them along with expensive trunkets from the Franklin mint.

Would you please give me a key?

I'll give you one for five hundred dollars.

I don't have any money.

Then you better get a job.

Where can I find a job?

There aren't any jobs here in Fun Land.

This is most irritating.

Wait a minute. There is a handsome reward out for the capture of that loud mouthed beast.

What loud mouthed beast?

The one that keeps us up all night singning 'Climb every Mountain' and 'Can't Help Lovin' Dat Man'.

I have heard of this monster already. I guess I'll have to find him.

Good luck. You're going to need it.

(You now have a pair of cool shades. You wonder why you keep finding things just lying around.)

Scene Ten

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Excuse me? Are you sleeping?

I'm awake now, thanks to you.

You look very tired.

What do you expect? I've been singing and dancing all night long.

Are you the monster that keeps everyone awake at night?

Yes. What are you going to do about it?

It's very rude of you to keep everyone in Fun Land up at night.

I don't care. It's my nature to sing, dance and tell jokes at night.

Why?

Why do you think? I'm a nocturnal kind of beast.

Do you know anything about Vinnie's Tomb?

Sure. I wrote a song about it. Do you want to hear it?

I guess so.

Then leave me alone, and come back tonight. I'll sing it for you then.

I want to hear it now.

Listen, you little punk. I've had about enough of you! Wait a minute. I'll give you a CD of the song. You can hear it anytime.

Thanks, but I don't have a CD player.

That's tough. Go away.

(You now have a the compact disc.)

The Singing Beast Says … Please don't hurt me. I'll stop singing at night, if you leave me alone.

Word quickly spreads that you have stopped the beast from singing at night. After everyone in Fun Land has a good night's sleep, they give you a load of cash and a nicely written thank you note. You decide to use the money to buy the key from the ill conceived horse. On the way to the horse's newly constructed hay shack and rib joint you meet a frog on welfare. Still feeling like a philanthropist, you foolishly give the frog most of your money. Fortunately, you still have enough to buy a pair of underwear and cheese.

You decide to buy a lottery ticket with your last dollar. Fun Land is a peachy place. You find that the creatures there are really kind and decent. You meet a monster snail who lets you stay at his hotel free of charge. In the morning you are informed that the singing beast has moved to Australia. He will be performing at the opera house one month a week. You're glad he made out okay. You are delighted when you win five hundred dollars in the lottery. You rush to find the horse and buy the key.

Scene Eleven

You buy the key from the horse. You now have the key to Vinnie's Tomb!

Scene Twelve

Passcode: NETTA

Travelling for thirty more days you come to a cliff. You realise you are desperately lost. You need to find a way to rise above Underworld and continue your exciting adventure. Suddenly a nasty creature jumps from behind you! It pushes you off the cliff!

Oddly enough you did not die. Instead, you landed on a strategically placed mountain of breakfast cereal.

You discover a nearby train station. You hop aboard the train bound for an unknown destination.

Being a low budget game, we could not afford a real train, so you'll have to imagine it.

Scene Thirteen

(Join the vinnie's Tomb fan club.)

You Read The Book … To cross the pit use the sphere of light. It rests on the other side. You must wake it if you can. Then you can get a ride.

You find an eight ball in the box.

You stretch the underwear over the forked stick in the ground. Now you have a neato slingshot device. Wow, this is a cool game!

You put the cool shades on.

You have drossed the pit of fear!

Scene Fourteen

Hello, is this the entrance to Vinnie's Tomb?

Allegedly, yes. No one knows how to get in. There are no doorways.

The entrance must be a secret.

I guess so.

What's this gray thing I'm standing in front of? It's shaped a bit like a tombstone.

That is also a mystery. It is known as the big blood rock. Don't ask me why. I have to go now. It's time to watch the PBS pledge break. It's nice meeting you.

You crush the skull that oozes blood against the big blood rock. The big blood rock opens!

You have opened the main dorr to Vinnie's Tomb

The glittery diamond has melted into the big blood rock.

Scene Fifteen

(Have you had a complete breakfast today?)

You try inserting the key into the keyhole. The key does not seem to fit! After a few more futile attempts, you realize that the horse may have tricked you. Perhaps, the snake brothers owned the only key to Vinnie's Tomb. You get so mad, that you kick the door. It creaks open. It must have been unlocked all the time.

Scene 17

You use the CD to reflect the beam of light. It might not work in real life, but this is only a stupid game.

The door opens and you have completed Scene Seventeen.

You walk into the next room of the massive tomb. Suddenly you are attacked by a giant Dragollater! He snatches you in his teeth. You will most likely die!

TO BE CONTINUED

Thank you for playing Vinnie's Tomb. Be sure to continue the adventure with Vinnie's Tomb Chapter Two - Shine and Glow Vinnie.